bullying

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I have spent quite a lot of time recently looking at schools for my girls. Without a doubt the most popular question from parents has "What's your bullying policy?" A valid question but I wonder how much more needs to be done at home?

Recently I was bullied. By grown women. In a public place. Unbelievable isn't it!

I attend a gym regularly and for the past 6 months have been going to the same gym class, frequented by the same people. I always arrive early as I come straight from kinder drop off, so I set up my equipment in the same spot. After 6 months of doing this I am approached by the gym instructor asking me if "I'm trying to make a statement by putting my stuff there" I wasn't quite sure what she was referring to. She proceeded to tell me that there was a group of women in the class that were very intimidating and that's where they liked to do the class from. That they in the past has caused trouble with anyone that puts there gear there. I almost started to laugh. Seriously are we in year 8?

No she was serious. It was at that point I realised that this was a form of bullying and although on this occasion they had decided not to confront me personally but get their gym instructor friend to help them out. I couldn't quite believe it. I informed the instructor I would be making a complaint about her and that I would not be moving my equipment and if anyone had an issue with this they could speak to me directly.

It got me thinking though... what sort of little bitches will these women be raising? And what will happen to the people they bully who unlike me may not have the confidence to stand up for themselves?

marriage

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We have just celebrated our wedding anniversary and it was bliss. I feel very happy, content and secure in my marriage, but it's got me thinking about the several friends I have that are going through the turmoil that infidelity brings and how they felt before they found out their husbands were cheating.

I've been there before, although I wasn't married, but my long term boyfriend cheated on me. I realised in hindsight that he didn't love me anymore and thats why it was easy for him to cheat. There were warning signs and I chose to ignore them. I accept that. What I don't accept is the cheating. Why not just tell me that it's over, separate from the relationship and then move on? My husband thinks that men like to try before they buy and that's why they cheat rather than separating.

I have 5 friends that are going through this right now and several that have in the past. All married. Some with children. It's got me thinking about whether or not the warning signs were there for them beforehand? Did they deep down know that things weren't good? Or has this come as a huge surprise?

It's also got me thinking about forgiving someone that does this to you. I think I probably could for my marriage and for my children, but I wonder how you would ever trust them again? This is what I would struggle with. I know that because of the infidelity that happened in a previous relationship it took a long time to be able to trust anyone again.

What do you think? Could you go back to the man/woman that cheated on you? And would you ever stop looking over your shoulder/ checking emails and text messages again?

perfect

i just had the perfect weekend

♥ snuggles with my girls
♥ singing in the car to nana and pa's
♥ coffee and chatting with the in laws
♥ a trip to the hot springs
♥ a stunning day
♥ sitting in the sun drinking boutique beers
♥ a delicious lunch
♥ a lot of romance
♥ a afternoon nap
♥ watching the sunset over the bay
♥ dinner out
♥ a few drinks out
♥ a small sleep in
♥ watching the sunrise over the bay
♥ a leisurely breakfast
♥ lots of chatting and hand holding
♥ reuniting with my girls
♥ fun in the park
♥ a picnic
♥ lots of family snuggles
♥ yummy dinner
♥ a big sleep

i feel amazing today... blissed out

reconnecting with my husband and falling just that little bit more in love with him

for those of you that are hurting

seeing the real me

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I have recently lost 23kg. I am feeling amazing, I have changed my life. My friends, colleagues, family tell me i look great all the time, but I still see the fat me in the mirror. It's really weird how your brain can trick you. I know the number on the scales is less. I know that the jeans i couldn't do up at Christmas time now fall off. I know that I've lost weight, yet there she still is, in the mirror, 2 chins, looking 8 months pregnant, puffing when she walks, ME. I wish my brain would hurry up and catch up to my body. It works the other way too. When you don't realise how bad things have gotten. I've always struggled with my weight. I am a classic yoyo dieter. Something clicked this year and for once I'm doing it the right way, the hard way. Even though I've been fat for a long time, I've never been comfortable with it. I know there are plenty of people out there embracing their curves these days and I am happy for them but to ME being fat has always equalled a decline in health and failure. I still have some more weight to lose. I'm hoping I will see the real me in the mirror very soon.

Have you experienced this? Your brain tricking you and not showing you what's real?

our school holiday bucket list

My girls are 4 so only attend kinder for 10.5hrs per week but i just love the school holidays. Nowhere to rush to and FULL days to spend with the girls. I spent a few moments with both of them and decided what we all wanted to do during the holidays and came up with a fab list.

I wanted to make our bucket list pretty like the one i found here but didn't get around to it. Will definitely do something like this for summer

Here is ours and based on more indoor activities as we live in Melbourne

I love a good list, do you?

who am i and why am i here?

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Aaahhh i love a fresh start and that's what this is. I am Shantell, Shan, mumma, muuuuuuummmmmm, cutie, Shani... I answer to many names. I am the face behind Missy Melly. I am a nurse and an acupuncturist. I am starting a new blog thats more about me and my life rather than just about Missy Melly. I felt constrained over at my Missy Melly blog as it's a children's clothing label. I am excited to let the REAL me out for ME and if anyone else wants to pop in and say hi then that would be fab.

I hope to blog about my life, my dreams, my fears, my loves, my dislikes, being a mummma, being a wife, being a friend, writing a book, cooking, craft, laughing, things I find on the net..... and so much more.